Brixley here… finally. Well my weary and not very loyal readers I must make my apologising to you for this greatly belated updation. There are three main reason for my unannounced sabbatical. Firstmost and forely I cannot tell you the first reason as I would have to kill you. Seconded by this is the penultimate reason which I would again have to cause grievous bodily harm to your good selves, per haps not death but definitely a good maiming if I told you. The last reason I am glad to report I can tell you, however it doesn’t make much sense, but here it is…
“Why have you not posted recently Brixley?” you ask to which I respond with the question”Why is there no word for an escalator that goes downward?”
Answer: Because Oxford and Webster got slack. Plus Oxford died in his pursuit of yours truly through the Spanish underground system 4 days ago. I wish I could tell you that I smote his remains upon the train-tracks but alas it is much more unglamorous. He had his feet on the seats and when the train jerked as it is predisposed to do, Oxford toppled onto an underground Yak that tossed his helpless body out the open window to what I presumed to be his fiery grave.
Well I hope that puts your mind to rest, one down and Webster to go. In other news J.R. Bingham called me from Boston to inform me of a new report that I am to write and to which I will report to you upon our next meeting.